By Jordan Yung Khang Lee

Photo by Estée Janssens on Unsplash.

No one is born with a perfect life. At some point, we will fail at something that we yearn to achieve. Half of those people would bounce back, but the remaining ones will go down the drain. The most resilient people are not afraid of failures. They use their pain to fuel them, improve their frame-of-mind, inspirit their pursuits and emblazon their spirits. Failure is something that we can’t escape from. It is merely a matter of time before we test ourselves in those trying times. It is unlikely to get through life without any impediments, be it large or small. Our society frowns upon failure, and it feels like an embracement of defeatism - failure is an undeniable devil. Believe it or not, your memoir is not defined by you failing hundreds or thousands of times. But how you bounced back from those crashes will establish your foundation to success. Some are better at pulling themselves up, and starting all over again - they will find a way to swivel themselves to victory. Yes, failure isn’t pleasant. It takes ages to recollect ourselves and bounce back again. But resilient people know how to utilise their innate power and centre their mind on usurping the fatal sting of complete and utter failure. In fact, anyone can implement various approaches to overcome the dispirited sensation that comes along when you fail. So what should you do to bounce back from failure?  

Be brutally honest with yourself

  The fundamental step for resilient people to bounce back from failure is by being relentlessly honest with themselves. They never sugarcoat the fact that they had failed once or even hundreds of times. They never talk themselves out to reduce the impact of that stifling sensation in them. Instead, they are 100% honest about what happens and never try to brush off the truth. When we start to be dishonest about our failures, we’re actually doing ourselves a disservice. Facts will always remain a reality - we can’t pretend that failures never happen in the first place. We have to be blunt and upfront about what happens. Remember, it is okay to fail. Failures will provide invaluable lessons, granting us the grit and strength, and grow ourselves to be better.  

Use failure as a motivation for you to achieve more.

  There is a psychology term called cognitive reappraisal, which is a process of framing your mind to adopt a disjoined attitude towards an activity, just like how we reframe negative emotions into positive ones. Doing so helps us cope with exacting events and reduce the tendency of us feeling despair. I was once aggressive in searching for jobs. After the 100th time, I received my employment letter and was thrilled for my first day of work. Documents were signed, and I received a green light to come to the office. However, when I was about to depart from home, the company went into voluntary administration. I was crushed. Ultimately, I decided to evaluate the situation more openly. It was wrong to blame anyone, no matter how frustrating it was. Rather than seeing failure as a dead-end, tell yourself that it is inevitable for this to happen and the good things will come after. There is always light at the end of a tunnel.  

Ignore the naysayers and focus on what matters most.

  Just like watching television while studying, we tend to be distracted from our goals. One of the ingredients of success is the ability for you to ignore any distractions and focus on what you aspire to achieve and do. Sometimes, it might be exasperating when you are surrounded by eye-catching media or people. And when this happens, your discipline will be put to an ultimate test. What you absorb inside will define your thoughts. You will forget what is standing ahead of you when social media distraction comes your way. So what should you do? Limit yourself to social media when you are busy pursuing your desires. Don’t let anything or anyone disturb your thoughts regardless of the circumstances. When you begin focusing on what truly matters, you will find that pathway to victory.  

Dream as big as you can.

  Sometimes, we are hesitant to dream big because we assume that we can’t achieve them. The truth is, you should never be scared to dream big.  Most successful entrepreneurs and leaders in the world earned their success only after countless monumental failures. Even when they had achieved success, they will still be facing defeats occasionally. Their dreams and ambitions are held firmly in their minds that flops will never break their spirit. Our mind is like a mould. Training it will govern how we learn and react - the brain can accomplish anything it can conceive depending on how rooted our mindset is. So don’t be afraid to keep trying! It might not occur within the timeframe that you expect, but as long as you never give up, it will happen someday. Trust yourself and the entire process! No matter the circumstances, nothing should stop us from bouncing back. We are born to be fighters, after all. Human beings are made to strive and achieve - many had big dreams and turned them into reality. Anything is achievable with the correct amount of focus and persistence. Anything is possible.